It took Naomi exactly four days of school to come home with a story that made my jaw drop. It goes a little something like this:
Naomi: I have a friend at school named Anna. Some people call her Anna Banana.
Me: Does she like being called Anna Banana?
Naomi: No.
Me: Ok, well you need to make sure you don't call her that if she doesn't like it.
Naomi: Ok.
[a few minutes pass...we were driving home]
Naomi: Later on, we were under the part of the slide that you climb up, and I told Anna that if anyone calls her Anna Banana to kick um in the crotch.
[I'm unsure but I may have temporarily blacked-out behind the wheel at this point]
Me: [after picking my jaw up off my lap...ya know, because I was sitting down] WHAT?!?! DON'T SAY THINGS LIKE THAT!!! WHERE DID YOU HEAR THAT???
Naomi: You.
Me: I'VE NEVER SAID ANYTHING LIKE THAT!!!
Naomi: Yes you DID! You said that if anyone ever tries to hurt me or steal me to kick um in the crotch.
Me: Uhh that does NOT apply to name calling Naomi. If someone calls you a name you just say, "That wasn't a very nice thing to say." and then you walk away.
Naomi: Ok.........I'll tell her that tomorrow.
Well this morning Naomi wanted to eat breakfast at school and since she hadn't done that yet I went in with her and helped her out, hung around while she ate, etc.
Guess who happens to be there eating breakfast too...ANNA BANANA OF COURSE...and naturally her father was hanging out with her too. So I bit the bullet, told him the story and said that if your daughter mentions kicking people in the crotch I'm to blame. He found it pretty funny...fortunately.
We are only four days into the school year. I'm sure it will only get more interesting/jaw-dropping.